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LOVELY WEEK NO.3: When I first had a child, I already cleared out what it would be like with two …  Still bonbonbunter. Still squeaky. Loud pictures: The siblings splashed together in the bathtub. Hand in hand, running across a meadow and hopping in the morning, congruently grinning in bed. I do not have any siblings, but always wanted some. Strife – of course, that would happen. I thought. When our number two was born, there was nothing else. Lasse screamed, raged, fought and suffered – and me with him. The jealousy floated over this small personality like a huge wave, sometimes hiding the little boy completely and almost took his breath away. I could not leave them alone for a second. Of sibling as I had in mind, no trace. Much more, I was a year – non-stop, breathless, desperate – so busy that the little man does not kill the very small one. But suddenly, very slowly, the very big aggressions retreated, like the North Sea at low tide. At first, quiet acceptance and curiosity seeped through in gossamer rivulets, after all there was a real affection here and there. Meanwhile, Luk Pelle screams with happiness when he sees Lasse. And Lasse? From the shower I watched my big boy secretly the other day, handing a toy to his brother, gently touching his head and whispering to him, “Love you, you little stinker!” Maybe it’s our very turbulent start – it’s me at least only a little as happy as my two see each other in togetherness.

And with you? How do your children understand each other?

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